Robbie Malone's Spectacularly Supernatural Swing
by Broken Antler in Winter
Summary: When 11 year-old Richard Grayson's British penpal is victim of a series of violent hate crimes in the East End of London, Matches' kid Robbie Malone goes to England to investigate. Led by scattered clues to a dingy old property with a bartender named Tom, he gets far more than he bargained for, and finds out something about himself in the process. Pre-show.


**Summary: When 11 year-old Richard Grayson's British penpal is victim of a series of violent hate crimes in the East End of London, Matches' kid Robbie Malone goes to England to investigate. Led by scattered clues to a dingy old property with a bartender named Tom, he gets far more than he bargained for, and finds out something about himself in the process. Pre-show. **

* * *

"This don't make sense," Robin, or Robbie Malone glared at the analysis of the crimes he had printed off from the Bat-Computer five days ago as he waited for the bartender, Tom, wasn't it? Anyways, as he waited for the bartender to bring his...butterbeer, though he didn't know if it was legal to sell that to an 11 year-old, "There ain't anything related 'bout these folks 'cept for the fact that they lived in East End, and then got shipped to hell. Ages 'pletely random, so's sex and even wealth fluctuates lots. Race goes random too."

One month ago, Richard Grayson was introduced via Alfred to Cassidy Parker, an intelligent and charming girl living in the East End of London. Three weeks into their correspondence, Cassidy was found murdered, though nothing could be found that was _wrong with her. _

She was just _dead and gone_.

As it was summer vacation, Robbie Malone was determined to crack the case, and avenge his friend, sneaking out from under the nose of his 'father', Matches Malone.

At the moment, Robbie was stuck in a rut. It seemed like the killings were done with magic, so maybe some underground organization like the Shadows? The problem was, none of the victims were related to each other in any way, except they lived in East End, where no one was likely to care.

"They don' even look same!" Robbie exclaimed quietly, eyes still observing his surroundings. The butterbeer arrived at his table, carefully placed by Tom.

"Excuse me, kid, but I haven't seen you here before. Are you new? Going off to Hogwarts?" Tom asked amiably, though Robbie couldn't shake off how condescending 'kid' sounded.

"Yeah, I'm new alright. Fresh off the boat from Uncle Sam. Tourist, Gothamite to the bone. Waiting for Pop to come 'round, dunno when he'll be here. What's Hogwarts?" he replied absentmindedly.

"Oh my, you don't know what Hogwarts is?"

"Nope."

"It's the best magical school of all! I thought its fame travelled overseas, but apparently not."

Robbie squinted at Tom, focusing and glossing over what he had just heard. "Magic, you say? Toto, I don' think I'm in Kansas anymore...that 'plains something..." he muttered sardonically, swaying his bottle around slowly. It was odd. Didn't anyone think it was queer for an 11 year-old to be alone in a bar?

Obviously there were some things about Britain that Alfred didn't care to tell him.

Looking around at the other people in the bar, Robbie shook his head. The things odd about the place counted more than a dozen. Was that a _wand _he just saw? Who knew there was a magical underground deep in the labyrinths of London?

It was then that a group of shoppers came by. Eight redheads, one black-haired boy, and one brunette girl, giving off the shining aura of a happy family. Robbie observed them for a moment when suddenly he blurted, "West? What the hell are you doing outta Central?"

The gangly redhead turned and looked alarmed, inquiring rather rudely, "Who are you, and how do you know my name?"

Giving his ratty hoodie a glance and pulling on the chewed-up shoelace of his red sneakers, Robbie smirked. His attire, the false tattoo, brown contacts, and messy wig must have fooled his best friend into not recognizing him. Removing the waterproof concealer that usually hid any facial scarring also had an effect. After all, Richard Grayson had blue eyes, smooth skin, and would never be caught dead wearing anything that Robbie had on. Meanwhile Robin would simply never show up without a mask or sunglasses.

Knowing his friend would recognize him if he gave enough clues, Robbie said incredulously, "Robbie Malone! Dude, we're best buds back in Gotham! Have I gotta wear a damn cape for you to know me? Or do Pop hafta stan' by and tell you to scram?"

Wally's eyes flickered in realization. "Rob? Dude, what are you doing here? How did you get here? You're not supposed to be able to come here!"

"Wally, dear, do you know who this is?" the bustling woman, obviously a mother, came over to Robbie with a flagrantly disapproving sniff.

"An' a nice to meet you too!" Robbie grinned wolfishly, deciding to milk his juvenile delinquent personality for all it was worth. To tell the truth, it was quite fun to see Wally get flustered. His other personas didn't give him the opportunity to be quote unquote 'bad'. Robin was (as he was always lectured on by Batman) a role-model and an inspiration of hope. Richard Grayson, on the other hand, was as timid as a baby rabbit, always polite, charming, and ultimately a boy scout.

Rather pathetic, if Robbie had to admit.

"Yeah, I was jus' wand'ring through London, vacation time, righ'?" Robbie stood up, hands in the pockets of his tattered black jeans, "Lookin' into thing or two, and bam! I find myself in this bar outta nowhere. Kid, you gotta explain to me. You part o' this underground magic cult or no? Cuz I know Zee exists, an' Giovanni too, but never thought in London...magic, serious?"

"Uh, yeah, _Robbie_, these are my cousins, the Weasleys, they're witches and wizards like me. This is Harry Potter, one of their friends, this is Hermione Granger. They're _magic. _But you're not, right? So how did you get in here? Non-magic folk aren't supposed to know about this place."

"How did'ja know 'bout being magic in the firs' place? An' this 'plains a lot about my case too..." Robbie trailed off, thinking about Cassidy, and how he could've just gotten there sooner and caught the gang responsible for the murders.

"Well, to get into Hogwarts," Wally whispered so as not to alert his cousins to Robbie's ignorance in many magical things, "They contact you, with an Owl. I started going two years ago, this is my third. For my night job I just shuttle back and forth, superspeed has its advantages, you know?"

"Did'ja say owl?" Robbie snickered, thinking back to the morning four weeks ago, "I gotta tell you, West, owl went and barged to my window 'bout month ago! Read the letter an' thought it some joke by Nigma, an' didn' wanna sacrifice night job or the Academy, or in my case as of now," Robbie added, referring to his current persona, "Juvie. So I as' Matches, Pop, 'bout it, an' he says it real! I though' it was some joke, and I sent letter back telling them go stuff themselves!"

"Dude!" Wally laughed, holding his hand out for a fistbump, "Can't believe you actually did that!"

"Yeah," shrugged Robbie nonchalantly as he fistbumped back, voice growing to the normal volume now that the sensitive information had been handled, "You know what I got here for, righ'? Definitely not for some school, Pop's too high profile for me to dis'pear."

"I am Percy Weasley," interrupted one of the particularly snotty looking of the cousins, who was wearing glasses and an odd badge, "Might I inquire who your father is?"

"Pop?" Robbie smiled innocently, sharing a glance with Wally, both pairs of eyes showing that they were going to have fun messing with this one, "Oh, he nobody! Jus' some pretty high rankin' in ol' Gotham's gang hierarchy, he can ge' any you wan' dead six fee' under!" He ended on a bright tone while the others looked horrified that Wally would make a friend like Robbie Malone.

Breaking the icy shocked silence, Robbie laughed, "Jus' kidding. He a con artist. Don' wanna step in wrong crowd with the Gothamites. So, where you folks all headed?"

Robbie's words didn't seem to alleviate them of any stress.

"We're going to Diagon Alley," Wally said, "You should probably come with us, Rob, if you're still stuck on the Cassidy case." Robbie's look completely changed, from nonchalant and prone to violence, to focused and determined. Nodding swiftly in approval, he said, "The freaks who killed her aren' gonna realize what hit 'em!"

Aware of Mrs. Weasley's glare, Wally added hastily eyes pleading, "Aunt Molly, he's okay! He's a friend! We just need a private place to explain everything once we get to Diagon Alley."

"Alright," she nodded curtly. "I guess we've been rather rude. I should introduce myself, I'm Molly Weasley, Wally's mother."

The only redhead girl of the group came up tentatively and introduced, "I'm Ginny."

The brunette girl also stood and rather haughtily said, "Hermione Granger."

A redhead who was constantly chatting with the 'Harry Potter' personality smiled nervously, rightly unnerved by Robbie's previous displays, "I'm Ron Weasley."

The twins smiled wolfishly at each other before saying, "I'm Gred!" "And I'm Forge!" obviously hoping to confound the delinquent standing carelessly in front of them. Robbie only raised an eyebrow, unimpressed, before retorting, "Yeah, and I'm goddamn Batman. This joker o'er here's the Boy freaking Wonder." Robbie nodded pointedly at his friend.

Wally sniggered far too loudly.

Seeing as everyone else was tentative, Robbie just rolled on, "So you's Harry Potter, and you the Mr. Weasley." Robbie systematically shook each of their hands, taking note of how filthy his blue, fingerless gloves were. "Well, thanks for takin' me to Diagon Alley, if you'll, lead on."

As they walked out of the back door of the Leaky Cauldron, each of them, except for Wally, extraordinarily tense in the presence of what seemed to them to be an amoral criminal, Robbie found them standing in front of a brick wall, using wands, _wands_, to tap at the wall and reveal a doorway through. The pathway swirled in colors and bloom, before clearing into a scene of hustle and bustle.

Walking through the portal to an oddly cleansing sensation, Robbie found himself listening to a maelstrom of voices screaming things such as, "Begin school fresh!" "September sales!" and "Beetle eyes, discount sale!" How did Superman deal with all the noise with super-hearing on top of it all? "I feel like Kent shouted at by Lois!" Robbie exclaimed, rubbing his ears forcefully, hoping to drown out all the sound. "Do your cousins know 'bout the night job?"

Facepalming when Wally decided to nod, Robbie ranted while the others' faces lit up with realization as to the fact that Robbie was another member of the vigilante community, "Wha'? So you go on tellin' ev'ryone your identity? That's fricking suicide, man! I guess I need no disguise no more, see you all in a jiff."

Robbie seethed as he walked into an alleyway to change out of his Malone clothes, when he heard someone speaking. "The Dark Mark have already targeted our next victim. Another East End slum's filthy little muggle." Racism against non-magical folk? That was a new one...

He stealthily hung a tracking device on the leaving figure, before going back into the alleyway.

"Well, at least I have a name now...Dark Mark? That is so not an astrous name for a gang. Time to change..."

Pulling off his wig, placing waterproof concealer to hide the scarring on his face and exposed skin, changing his hoodie and t-shirt from the ones in his pack, putting on a pair of sunglasses, and taking off his ratty jeans to reveal a pair of tan cargo pants, Robbie transformed himself completely, to be nearly unrecognizable. "Master of disguise," Robbie Malone, now Robin the Boy Wonder in civvies, muttered to himself proudly.

The first thing he said when he walked out into the streets was, "KF, you are such an idiot!"

* * *

Harry Potter watched critically as this Robbie Malone walked out of the alleyway a completely different person. His first impression of Robbie Malone was rather unpleasant. He swore, his speech was littered with grammatical errors, and his walk was such a swagger that reminded himself too much of Malfoy for his opinion to be positive. But now, he walked out as a completely normal 11 year-old boy, although punching Wally in the nose was _not _normal.

"What?" Robbie turned to them, cocking his head to the side, "He has speed healing, it'll be alright in a minute. Anyways, how did you all find out about Wally being KF?"

"Please don't kill me, Rob," Wally rambled, "It was yesterday and we were going to go to Hogwarts and I got so excited I began running in superspeedpleaseforgivemedon'tmaimme!"

It seemed as if Robbie rolled his eyes, though it couldn't be seen under his sunglasses. "Sure Wall-man. Just...Never. Do. It. Again." Harry never knew that a kid could deal out a glare as powerful, especially without having anyone be able to see his eyes. He turned to Mrs. Weasley. "Apologies for having to act like a delinquent, Mrs. Weasley. I have to keep my cover. I may have overdone it a little, though." He smiled sweetly, and it seemed as if Mrs. Weasley's heart melted.

"Oh don't worry, dear. It if you don't mind I ask, Robbie, which hero are you?" she asked.

"Robin, Boy Wonder, from Gotham. Have you heard of me?"

"Wally's told us lots about you," she replied sincerely. Instantly, Robin's face darkened, as he looked to Wally and glared. Wally himself only smiled weakly.

"Anyways, dear," Mrs. Weasley said, "Do you want Wally, Hermione, Ron, and Harry to show you around Diagon Alley? Hermione, Ron, and Harry are second-years." Robin nodded, and turned to the two of them.

"Okay. Where do you want to go now?"

Wally grinned.

Soon Wally led took them to buy potions supplies, where, instead of actually looking for the supplies, he poked and prodded at the bulging ingredients with the air of a mad scientist. Harry heard Robin scoff, "So, KF, you _always _say magic doesn't exist. Really?"

At the moment, Malfoy walked into store with his father. "Father, it seems that we've arrived in the presence of some filthy mudbloods and blood traitors. Weasley and Granger," he sneered theatrically. Harry heard Robin (who was wrapped in a conversation with Hermione about Time-Turners, whatever that was) groan, muttering darkly about 'older versions of little D'.

"What does mudblood mean?" Harry asked Ron, who turned into a shade of purple.

"It's a racial slur that only the likes of Malfoy would even think about saying!" Ron yelled, stepping forward to curse Malfoy, who stood coolly against Ron.

"Are you going to attack my son? You understand that I am in the board of directors, right, Weasley?" Lucius Malfoy stated coldly. "I have some rights, and I have the ability to expel students from Hogwarts."

Robin sniggered, and chose then to walk to the older Malfoy and smile sweetly. "Hi!" he said, sticking out a hand to shake, which Lucius took with amused contempt, "I'm Robbie Malone. Don' know if you heard o' me or no', but do you wanna know why I got into Juvie, that's prison for kiddos, when I was nine? I kill an'ther stree' kid. Self defense, they said. Didn' matter. I ha' nothing to lose. I don' go to no Hogwarts, you can't hol' that 'gainst me. But livin' on the streets teach me how to cut you face into ribbons. You an' your snot-nosed sonny. Got it?"

"What are you saying, you are threatening a Malfoy-"

Robin punched Lucius and Malfoy both, knocking them out. Seeing as the shop was unmanned at that moment, Robbie smiled proudly. "Were you really going to mutilate Malfoy?" Ron asked, inappropriately excited.

"No," chuckled Robin, rolling his eyes, "I'm just a really good actor. See you guys if I decide to go to Hogwarts! I'll look up those time-turners, Hermione! I'll be going, I have a name, the gang Dark Mark, to trace now, anyways. They'll be behind bars...well...they'll be conscious in twenty minutes, you guys should leave this place. It was nice meeting you all! Wally, video games at Barry's in a week!"

Robin cackled. It was an eerie thing, echoing through the apothecary. They turned away from Robin to look at the two Malfoys, but when they turned back, he had already disappeared. Wally muttered, "I hate bat behavior."

Ron turned to Wally and asked, "Can you teach me to punch like that?"

When Harry got on Hogwarts Express, he was met by a rambunctious first-year, by the name of Richard Grayson. There was something familiar about him...

**THE END?**

* * *

**So Robin uses Time-Turners to work at Hogwarts, under the name of Richard Grayson, his REAL NAME. :P Harry is clueless, and Hogwarts won't know what hit 'em. **


End file.
